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经典英语超搞笑笑话大全

2017-09-20 06:03趣味英语 浏览:

 幽默和笑话有概念上的区别,笑话是滑稽言谈本身,幽默在这里则被作为心智和性情层面上的概念来看待。下面是巴士网小编带来的经典英语搞笑笑话,欢迎阅读!

经典英语超搞笑笑话大全

  经典英语搞笑笑话篇一

  Teacher:We all know that beat causes an object to expand an cold cauese it to contract.Now,can anyone give me a good example?

  John:Well ,in the summer the days are long,and in the winter the days are short.

  老师:我们都知道热胀冷缩的道理.现在,谁给我举个例子?

  约翰:嗯,在夏天天都长,在冬天天都短.

  经典英语超搞笑笑话篇二

  I think that I'm a chicken

  Psychiatrist:What's your problem?

  Patient:I think I'm a chicken.

  Psychiatrist:How long has this been going on?

  Patient:Ever since I was an egg!

  精神病医师:你哪里不舒服?

  病人:我认为我是一只鸡.

  精神病医师:这种情况从什么时候开始的?

  病人:从我还是一只蛋的时候开始.

  经典英语超搞笑笑话篇三

  One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples, but isn"t that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What"s time to a pig?"

  一天,有一个城市里的游客来到一个小乡村,在乡间路上开着车,想看看农庄是什么样子,也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子。这位城里人看见一位农夫在宅后的草地 上,手中抱着一头猪,并把它举得高高的,好让它能够吃到树上的苹果。城里人对农夫说,"我看你的猪挺喜欢吃苹果的,但是,这不是很浪费时间吗?"那位农夫 回答说,"时间对猪有什么意义?"

  经典英语超搞笑笑话篇四

  The mean man's party

  The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party.Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment,he said,"Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow.When the door open,push with your foot."

  "Why use my elbow and foot?"

  "Well,gosh," was the reply,"You're not coming empty-hangded,are you?吝啬鬼请客

  一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了.他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说:“你上到五楼,找中间那个门,然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃.门开了之后,再用你的脚把门推开.”

  “为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?”

  “你的双手得拿礼物啊.天哪,你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答.

  经典英语超搞笑笑话篇五

  The Fish Net

  Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?

  A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.

  鱼网

  你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安? 老师发问道。

  把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。 小女孩回答道。

  经典英语超搞笑笑话篇六

  a great man Teacher: Would Shakespeare be a great man if he were still alive today? Student: Of course. He must be a great man, for so far nobody has lived to over 400 years.

  一名伟人

  老师:如果莎士比亚还活着,他会是一名伟人吗? 学生:当然。因为到目前为止,还没有人活到400多岁。

  经典英语超搞笑笑话篇七

  Two students missing to exam

  Two undergraduates had a week of toughexams coming up. But it was too late for them to start the review. Theirbiggest exam was on Wednesday and they tried to trick their professor by sayingthat their car had broken down the night before due to a very flat tire andthey needed a bit more time to study.

  两个本科生在一周后即将迎来一个魔鬼考试周。然而他们实在复习的太迟了。最重要的一场考试在周三,然而他们决定欺骗一下教授,谎称前夜车轮漏气抛锚了,所以请求多一些考试准备时间。

  The professor granted them another day tostudy. That evening, both of the boys crammed all night until they were surethat they knew just about everything.

  教授多给了他们一天时间去准备。当夜,他们一夜没睡,彻夜苦读,确信知识点已经了解,并且全部搞懂。

  Arriving at class the next morning, eachboy was assigned to separate classroom to take the exam. As each sat down, theyread the instruction:

  次日到达教师之后,两个学生被分配到不同的教室进行考试。当他们坐定,看到试卷上说明如下:

  “For 5 points, explain the contents of atomand how to evaluate the stability of it with appropriate reference. For 95points, tell me WHICH tire it was!”

  “解释原子成分并借助适当的资料评估其稳定性,共计5分;剩余95分是请告诉我是哪一个轮胎漏的气!”

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